The Lighter Side
13 Ways to Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity
- At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.
- Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice.
- Put your garbage can on your desk and label it "in."
- Put decaf in this coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.
- In the memo field of all your checks, write "for smuggling diamonds."
- Finish all your sentences with "In Accordance with The Prophecy."
- Order a diet water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face.
- Specify that your drive-through order is "To Go."
- Put mosquito netting around your work area and play tropical sounds all day.
- Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their party because you're not in the mood.
- When the money comes out the ATM, scream "I Won, I Won!"
- When leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking lot, yelling "Run For Your Lives, They're Loose!!"
- Tell your children over dinner, "Due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go."
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